*Too many people wondering what I'm doing
But they need to concentrate on what they doing*
I'm crawling struggling feeling so low bound in this flesh
That experiences pain hardship and problems
Wish i had the solution a certain way to solve them
Letting anger envelope me exploding on the ones who care
My girl stands by my side but my love i refuse to share
So cold and alone lost in this world of sorrow
Asking people if they got a couple of dollars I could borrow
Need to eat need to fill my gas tank up I'm hitting the road
Heading away from this people this environment everything I've ever known
This justice system got me doing five years
But to them I won't give the gratification to see my tears
I refuse to be down refuse to give in
Cause this is my life so I'm in it to win
Destroyed what I could've been
Got people looking at me like I'm drenched in sin
Wish my life shine like the glistening of my chain
Before if you had a problem with me yea sure we could've bang
But I'm tired of all this strain
Tired of my heart being filled with pain
So I put up my walls
Made a promise that to no one I'll let them fall
Kept everything held in and yea its the truth
Even lying to the pastor in the church booth
All I want is a little privacy a little happiness in my life
Instead I'm filled with dread and nineteen years of strife
I want it all to go boom boom boom and blow it all away
And through it all the ashes and smoke i see my baby left to stay
Got a few pulling for me and yes you are appreciated
But it feels as if my soul is being chopped up decapitated
Wish I hadthe will to let me feeings show
But it's kind of hard when my self esteem is so low
Trying to be lifted
Looking for that one person to make me feel gifted
As if I've truly been blessed
If I can have it let me know I won't settle for less
Trying to cope with this thing called life but what if I'm gone
What will be left behind what legacy maybe my poems and this song
Crying on the inside
Letting it be known that I'm dying on the outside
Inhaling this posion cruising through my veins steady running through my system
Let my mother father my family know I'm surely going to miss them
Too many people I've let down doesn't feel to good to know its true
So what would you think if I was reading this piece to you
Would you care feel pity or brush me aside
Would you hide that hurt feeling that you feel inside
Right now I don't kno who to trust
In this world filled with heartache and lust
False emotions
Only place I can get away is staring at this water of the ocean
Feeling the breeze coming from the sea
I guess the only person I can count on is me
Lost in this world of scorn
Got me feeling so small like a infant newborn
No one understands where I'm coming from Don't understand my pain
This struggle it is just to go about my day
Trying to keep my head up stand up and walk tall
There are certain moments where I don't want to talk at all
Just want to break down and cry cry cry
But I'd rather be alive then looking forward to die die die
I'm left bleeding in the street staring up at the sky
And no one notices they just be passing me by
Look me in my eyes
I bet you'll be surprised
To see I'm filled with life yet and so much potential in me
At times I feel like I'm on a whole other world these people can't see me
So I'm going to say this one time
Don't you dare try to judge me or compare your life to mine...
